Game 7: Mitch Kupchuk - Polish Sausage with Cabbage

Before getting dumped in Jeanie Buss’ 2017 ownership coup, Mitch Kupchak devoted nearly his entire life to the Lakers. The 6’9” power forward signed with the Lakers in 1981 at Magic Johnson’s request following their early playoff exit and became a key part of their 1985 championship. But injury problems plagued Kupchak, leading him to apprentice under general manager Jerry West before officially hanging up his jersey a year later. Kupchak finally became GM in 1995 and held that title for over two decades, playing a key role in building five title winning teams. But to me, Kupchak’s legacy will be trading for eccentric Spanish power forward Pau Gasol, one of my favorite players ever and the namesake for this blog

Pau and another doctor shortly after performing 16 hour brain surgery.

A future Hall of Famer, Pau almost never played in the NBA. At just 11 years old, Pau realized his life’s calling after watching Magic Johnson on TV. But Magic wasn’t gliding through the air, throwing no-look passes to Vlade Divacs. He was announcing his retirement due to HIV. Pau asked his mom, a doctor, and dad, a nurse, if Magic could survive this disease. Their negatory answer inspired Pau to enroll in the University of Barcelona’s medical school, determined to find a cure for HIV/AIDS. But blessed with 7 feet of height and a rare passing touch not seen in big men since, well, Magic Johnson, Pau made the difficult decision to make basketball his profession.

He was drafted third overall in the 2001 NBA Draft and became the first international player to win Rookie of the Year. Today, the ROY award has gone to international players in three of the last five seasons and disciples of balling European pioneers like Pau dominate this once purely American sport. Looking like an ostrich, grunting like a women’s tennis player, and sweating like Patrick Ewing in a car with the windows rolled up, Pau smashed the young Memphis/Vancouver Grizzlies’ individual records in his 6.5 years with the team. But across the country, Kobe was telling fans in an Orange County parking lot that Mitch Kupchak needed to find him a #2 guy, and fast.

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In late 2007, a battered Lakers team with the frontcourt options of Kwame Brown (lol), Chris Mihm (come on), Ronny Turiaf (lmao), Brian Cook (forgot about that fool), and a 20 year old Andrew Bynum (hell yeah) was clearly on its way to another early playoff exit. That’s when Kupchak pulled off, at the time of the trade, one of the most lopsided deals in NBA history. Kupchak sent Brown and some scrubs, two 1st round picks, and the rights to Pau’s little brother, Marc, in exchange for the 7 foot Spaniard. The deal would even itself out within a few years as Marc evolved into the All-Star champion he is today, but Pau’s impact was immediate. The Lakers steamrolled their way to the #1 seed and the first of three consecutive Finals appearances.

Kobe loved Pau. And there’s a damn good reason for that. Without Pau, Kobe never wins his two Shaq-less titles. Kobe’s career legacy trajectory was completely altered by his other big man. Pau fit perfectly in Phil Jackson’s triangle offense. A big man who could score in or near the post in a million ways, but always deferred to the star shooting guard. Pau passed beautifully and ran like a much smaller man. And though we rarely got to see it, Pau also had some ball-handling skills in his back pocket. Even Pau’s native tongue came in handy; he and his fellow polyglot Kobe spoke Spanish on the court to keep defenses in the dark.

But you know who didn’t love Pau? Lakers fans. Those same rabid Kobe stans who used titles #4 and #5 to bolster his position as the G.O.A.T. never gave Pau the credit he deserved for helping Kobe even enter that conversation. The airwaves of ESPN 710 and AM 570 were filled for years with angry callers saying that Pau’s body was crumbling or that new coach Mike D’Antoni’s fast-paced offense was proof that Pau should be sent to the glue factory. After the disastrous Dwight/Nash/Kobe/Pau “superteam” of the 2012-2013 season, Pau heard Lakers fans loud and clear and signed with the Chicago Bulls. He would go on to make the All-Star team in back-to-back seasons. Not bad for being washed up.

Space is getting limited out there in Star Plaza, but Pau deserves his own statue outside of Staples Center. It might take some heavy lobbying from Kobe to Jeanie Buss, but maybe one day, five years after his retirement, when he’s finally eligible for the Hall of Fame and is voted in on the first ballot, we’ll see him in all his bronze glory: Wet hair, neck veins bulging, eyes popping out like a pug, pump faking three helpless defenders and rising above them all.

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Polish Sausage with Cabbage

1 medium-large head of cabbage, coarsely shredded

1 Apple, peeled and diced

Salt to taste

1 medium onion, chopped

1 to 2 lb polish sausage

1 tablespoon lemon

1 tablespoon butter

1 ½ tablespoon wine vinegar

Over medium heat in covered 4 quart sauce pan, simmer cabbage with apple, lemon juice, 1 teaspoon salt, and ½ cup water for 15 minutes, stirring occasionally.

Meanwhile, in a 10 inch deep skillet over medium heat, cook onion in hot butter until tender. Stir in cabbage mixture, 1 teaspoon of salt, vinegar, and sausage chunks. Reduce heat to low, cover and simmer for 30 minutes until sausage is heated through. Serve with plain boiled potatoes flavored with parsley.

Homemade horseradish is also served. Made with fresh graded raw beets and raw horseradish root, peeled and grated and mixed together. The more beets used, the less potent the horseradish becomes. Suit your own taste.

Good lesson when cooking cabbage: Never underestimate it. Literally. I thought the medium head of cabbage I chopped was too much for my pot, so I only threw in half of it (along with only one of the two polish sausages I bought). But once it cooks down for a half hour, I was left with what looked like a couple teaspoons of cabbage to go along with my kielbasa.

Oh well! Still tasted very good, so compliments to Mitch Kupchak’s mom. I wish she included a recipe for the homemade horseradish. I still wanted to add heat to the recipe, so I bought a small bottle of prepared horseradish. Horseradish: It’s not just for Passover!